Myths vs Facts: Emotional Regulation in Kids and What Parents Should Know

As parents, it can be easy to feel confused and overwhelmed by all the advice out there about kids and their emotions. Here are some common myths related to emotional regulation in kids.

One common myth is that children will “grow out of” emotional outbursts. The truth is? Emotional regulation is not something that just happens with age; it is a skill that needs to be taught and practiced over time. When your calm meets a child’s storm, co-regulation is able to occur and kids learn valuable tools for regulation.

Another misconception is that letting kids express big feelings might encourage “bad” behavior. However, allowing kids to feel and expressemotions in a safe space helps them learn to manage those feelings, and can reduce outbursts over time. When we validate their emotions instead of shutting them down, we’re helping them build emotional intelligence, resilience, and trust. Many parents also assume that discipline alone will solve emotional challenges. But emotional regulation isn’t about consequences, it’s about connection, guidance, and understanding.

Kids need help identifying their feelings, understanding what might trigger them, and learning calming strategies like breathing or meditation exercises, taking a break, or finding the right language to express themselves.The good news is, you don’t have to be perfect, just present. By modeling healthy emotional regulation skills and habits and offering consistent support, you are giving your child valuable tools they need to handle life’s challenges with confidence and security.

Written by Amanda Addiego, LCSW